Mental Illness Strikes Again
I was walking on the bike trail some months ago and met a woman walking her dog too. She was new in the neighborhood. After 5 minutes of talking to her, I felt compelled to tell her my daughter was diagnosed with a schizoaffective disorder. She seemed shocked. I was wondering why I mentioned it so quickly without knowing her. There must have been a reason, we both thought, when she told me her family has mental illness. Her brother and mother. She spent some time telling me that there is no one to talk to about these illnesses. We only met 2 or 3 times since then, but it had been profound in what few minutes we shared of our experiences.
Her brother is in his fifties now; was a brilliant professor, and he decided, one day, to stop taking medication to become homeless. That's what he wanted to be. She said he hated her mother who also had a mental illness, but she was never sure what kind of mental illness. Nor is she sure what kind of mental illness her brother has.
At that first meeting on the path, she never said her son had a serious problem. I thought she said at that time, he only had a hearing problem.
About two months ago, I saw her from a distance on the path, and I tried to catch up with her, but her cell phone rang and she quickly walked home.
Today, when I saw her from a long distance walking towards her home up the hill, I decided to walk my dog up to her house.
I wanted to say, "Hi, I have been thinking of you."
We had both wanted to get together over coffee after our first introduction on the trail, but we never got that far.
I rang her door bell and stood back from the door, so my dog would not run in her house; and so she could see me from the front window. When she opened the door I could tell she looked a little tired.
I asked her how she is doing.
She said, " Not too well." I asked if she was sick.
She said, "No." She had just put her son in a mental, residential facility and she was embarrassed to admit it. He had been there two weeks now and she is worried about the gossip and his recovery, etc.
Having been there and done that: I could tell she was at her wit's end. I told her she should get her hair done now because she has done all she can do for now.
She cannot worry about what others think. It's not her fault. It's God's doing. She said the psychologists made her feel guilty because they kept asking her questions of "how" did her son become mentally ill.
They already know her brother and mother had some kind of mental illness. I told her it really doesn't matter how it happened because it's all 'trial and error' in giving medication; it's like a crap shoot. It's in the DNA somewhere. Who knows? Maybe it was a great, great, great, great grandparent who had it. Everyone is guessing.
I had told her about Appleton at McLean Hospital some months ago, but she had a relative who had good results from Red Rock in Utah and they have a string of facilities; each one different depending on the illness. Her son is depressed and has mood swings. She is thinking, Bipolar.
He is 17 years old. He started stealing from the house to pay for his drug habit.
He came home from school, high on drugs. When he had mood swings and it became apparent that this situation was getting worse, she contacted her cousin.
She was told there was a Red Rock facility in Oregon. One in which her son would have a regiment of exercise, healthy foods and chores to get over the addiction of drugs; and then the treatment for his mental illness.
All I could do is reassure her that she must live for today. She cannot think about the "what ifs," or the gossip. If everyone in the neighborhood knows there is a problem because the ambulance and fire truck comes screaming up to her house; then so be it. Tell a few neighbors you know and they, I am sure, will tell everyone else. If you don't feel comfortable with some of the neighbors, than don't say anything. People will make up and say whatever they want. They are not saints.
From my experience, I told her she is very lucky to have gotten her son; although, by physical force from an agency who handles reluctant patients, to a facility that can help him. As it was the, not knowing, from day to day what her son would do, unsupervised in her home with her younger daughter, that was the real danger and now she can relax.
She said that the school her son went too; and where my daughters had once gone, is running rampant
with drugs. She heard that one girl in detention took drugs from another student in the room and then they went into the bathroom to have sex.
Her son was buying drugs in school and coming home high.
The reason I am writing this blog: It is beyond my imagination that our society is choosing to ignore the problems in our high schools and colleges; destroying any hope for the future generation.
She said that one of the parents asked the principal, who is also an elder in her church; to have a meeting of teachers and parents to discuss how parents can detect if their child is using drugs. The principal responded: "We can't have a meeting like that because people will think we have a drug problem."
I don't know why parents aren't screaming at the top of their lungs, "No! You don't have a drug problem! My child has a problem being in your school where drugs are passed around like candy. It's Your responsibility to get the drugs out of school."
My daughters remember some kids having marijuana when they were there some 8 years ago, but it is no where near the problem it is today because the so called "educators" don't care.
It's no wonder that 22 year old who shot and killed so many people in Tucson, AZ was able to do so because the school system he was in; although, they detected he was mentally ill and had him kicked out of school; They never took the responsibility of having him removed from society by force. Knowing what they knew.
Those morons, school officials, who come on the news saying they knew he would harm someone eventually because of his behavior.....Ya! Ya! Ya..
Then shut up and get off the News. I don't want to hear what you Didn't DO.
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